mutex 'er up

mutex 'er up

Some overzealous locking to track down RequestObject related crashes.

bc0fa4d689a4 wrongly locked the current event loop's
request_invalidation_lock instead of the invalidation's list lock.

Also Abstract UI is able to delete requests concurrently with with
EventLoop invalidation.
e.g. PortManager::PortRegisteredOrUnregistered  and GlobalPortMatrixWindow
so the lock needs to be exposed.

If this solves various issues, mutexes should to be consolidated
(request_buffer_map_lock + request_invalidation_lock) and be chosen
such that there is as little contention as possible.